Let's have a little chat about hormones. Boy oh boy they are responsible for us doing some craaaazy things and they only get more complicated when we are pregnant. The hardest thing is letting go and understanding that it’s all a part of the changes that are going on in our bodies. One thing I would like to talk about though is finding the balance of hormones to help ease this crazy time.
The easiest way to look at it is like a scale. On one side there is the ‘rest and digest’ hormones and on the other side there is the ‘fight and flight’ hormones.
Oxytocin is the hormone that increases during pregnancy and in the period after the birth of your baby. It is responsible for the increased production of your milk, bonding, love and empathy that you very much need during this time. Oxytocin is the main hormone that sits on the ‘rest and digest’ side of the scale and this is exactly where you too should be sitting. It is vital that during pregnancy and in the postpartum period (the time after your baby is born) your levels of oxytocin and other ‘rest and digest’ hormones are in balance and are doing what they are designed to do.
As a society, we need to work on reducing the fight and flight hormones during not only pregnancy but also in the postpartum period. Anything that triggers stress has the potential to limit your ability to tap into the natural biological changes that support you to be the mother you want to be. During pregnancy, stress can impact your baby’s neurodevelopment ultimately impacting them as a child and adult.
If things don’t go to plan and there is a build-up of the fight and flight hormones then things can spiral. If you aren’t able to be in the relaxed state intended, it will be extremely hard to be in tune with your body and your baby. Feelings of overwhelm and isolation can take hold, let's face it; we have all been there. In fact, over 80% of mothers feel exhausted and overwhelmed at some point in their motherhood journey. This is real, and left untreated can most definitely lead to Postnatal depression.
So how do you ensure you spend most of the postnatal period on the ‘rest and digest’ side of the scale?
You rest… Easier said than done right? Well, this is a matter of both you and your baby’s health, so I would say it’s worth prioritising. Wouldn’t you?
It's vital you work on resting your mind and your body. As a community of mothers, we need to stop comparing and pressuring ourselves to be supermums. We need to just be. Be with our baby and our body. We have to learn how to ask for help. Speak to our friends, family, and neighbours and ask for their support. Flowers are nice but a cooked meal is sooooo much better and I think it's ok to ask for this. We need to rest our minds from comparison and judgement. We must learn that we don’t need to know everything and do everything right away.
It is very easy to suffer from information overload. We need to stop looking for a solution. There isn’t one size fits all or a magic pill to answer all the questions. We need to teach and support one another not as experts but as friends and as a community of mothers. We need to allow confidence and allow every mother to find her unique way.
I truly believe;
Every mother already has the answers to her questions; she just needs the confidence, support and love to hear them.
And as always, be kind to yourself, you are doing the best job you can!
